I just wanted to share some of the more humorous subject lines from recent SPAM I’ve received, the title of this post being one of them. And you’ll note, not one about cumming like a porn star. Jizz-minded spammers appear to be, um, slacking.

– Celebrate National Blow Job Day! (Please note, the actual date for this momentous new holiday was not specified. Dang. But if anyone knows the date I’d like to pass it on to some people I know.)

– See thru bras and undies (Somebody should read my X-ray Specs post)

– Boggle her mind thoroughly (indeed, with the right pill I could blind her with science…literally)

– Get a totally Wicked Weiner

– Shove it in her face today

– Shover your dick in her (that’s correct – SHOVER – for those times when shoving it in her face just isn’t enough.)

– Whip your pecker into shape

– Elongate your trouser snake

– More flesh on your pole

– Length and girth are very important (Well, I have been making the girth argument for years…)

– Explore her deep hole

– Explore her deep hole more (I’m still waiting for Explore her deep hole the most)

The next three arrived in my inbox in the following order. I found it particularly amusing.

– Are you tired of high gas prices?

– Pump Harder and Longer

– Stop paying high prices for gas 60% DISCOUNT NOW!