I was scanning the CNN site earlier to catch up on recent headlines. I noticed in the lower right portion of my screen there was a list of recommended articles based on my browsing history. Now you might expect my top pick to be something about jerkoff drivers, Oprah’s sex toys, conservative hypocrisy…you know, the standards. But instead, article number one, the thing CNN thought I would be most interested in reading…

Dad denies throwing kids off bridge

I couldn’t help but wonder why CNN thought I would be interested in this very specific piece. What in my browsing profile led them to this bit of detection? Do I look like the kind of guy who’d even consider bridge chucking? I will be the first to admit that I’ve raised my voice with my children. Once in a while. But I never even considered throwing them off a bridge. I never even mentioned it. Okay, maybe once I threatened to leave them under the bridge with the grumpy old troll, but hasn’t everyone?

(I hope that somebody gets the Dora reference – or do I watch too much Nick Jr?)