Want a glimpse into contemporary American cultural viability? I invite you to visit any lyrics website on the Web that allows for comments. Search on something juicy like “meaningful Beyonce lyrics.” Now, stop chuckling. Of COURSE Beyonce’s lyrics are meanignful. Deeply spiritual and meaningful. Life changing in fact.

Hah! Didn’t think I could write that with a straight face, did you?

Sure, any semi-intelligent, upright-walking mammal SHOULD be able to sniff out the general thematic leanings of Beyonce’s art. And if you like it you can put scott kay bands all over it. For reals.

If you are attractive and wealthy and willing to expose your lust/affection/erectile dysfunction/Daddy-Daughter issues to me by disposing of a significant portion of your wealth in the service/adoration of me, I will sleep with you as part of a good Christian girl’s courting ritual.

How you know she’s a hypocrite? Look who she married. He may be absurdly wealthy (and who knows about the dysfunction thing – but there are pills for that) but attractive?