You know what we need more of? We need more nipple tassels in everyday life. Totally. I mean, nothing too crazy or racy, but maybe some solid PG-13 type stuff. Don’t you think that would make life better? Even if it didn’t happen until after 8, when the really young and impressionable kids are finally in bed (at least if their parents are TRYING to do a good job). Up until then, everyone can wear loose fitting, blousy button down shirts. And then at 8, a little bell could ring in all the chain restaurants and video stores and movie stores and off come the shirts!

Think about it. Isn’t that the kind of world you want to live in?