In getting back out there, doing the acoustic gig thing, I find I wish I had a little accompaniment. Not necessarily a lot of accompaniment, but something. I like the guitar, voice, and drums combo. Maybe if I could hook up with a multifaceted drummer. Like all congas and bongos and djembes. Maybe some tambourine. A bitchin’ train bell even. That would be so sweet. You’d want to hear that, right?
So the wet and hot reality is that I was looking at one of my better acoustic guitars acorss the room in its case and thinking that I probably have to check its humidity. Yup. That’s it.
You did know that humidity is incredibly important to the health of a guitar, right? Particularly old acoustics stored in a basement that slowly goes from Summer heat to Winter chill. Well, being in the closet under the stairs helps protect all of my instruments from abrupt temperature change, but still… these things are made out of wood and wood needs some care to keep behaving over time.
Sorry if you thought Louisville real estate was going to play into this whole round of nonsense. I just couldn’t help myself.
As the king of indie nonsense, I am a huge fan of cheap business card printing. I have musician cards to hand out to baooking agents and club owners, I have Mad Science The Card Game Cards for distributors and retailers, I have Skateboard Heroes cards for comic book industry folks and readers. I should probably get into the printing business myself. Then I could have business cards for my business card printing business. Makes perfect sense, right? I bet you wish you’d thought of it.
For a minute there I thought my little flat screen was fried, the one in front of my elliptical, and the daily grueling exercise regimen that keeps me off crazy-ass medication was about to get significantly more tedious. I was saved by a little old school CRT from the kitchen that has barely been watched since number 3 was born. I got the little flat screen working but I kind of prefer the old school TV for a couple of reasons, not the least of which is shear volume. Over the grind of the elliptical in mega-resistance mode coupled with the fan that keeps me from sweating a river that could drown the kittens, the added decibels helps.
But it all reminded me of a plan a couple months ago that I’m glad fell through. I’m not one for floor stand mounts and funky home theater contrivances, but on a whim I bought a clearance wall mount for smallish flat screens a while ago. I had just installed the LED monster in our living room, so I have an idea how much these things cost, so the clearance one was a worthwhile gamble. It was my plan to get my little exercise flat screen off the glorified plant stand and onto the wall so I could move my machine forward a foot or so and free some extra footage for the home studio. Alas, my little flat screen was not compatible with the inexpensive wall mount. Then I saw a Black Friday deal on a smallish flat screen that would definitely fit the mount for something like a hundred bucks. But I just didn’t have it in me to risk a tramplin’ at the Kingston Best Buy at 4am with a bottle of Vinho Verde and Mom’s incredible stuffing still metabolizing in my gullet.
Ah well. Anyone need a low profile mount for a 20-24″ flat screen? I’ll give you a good deal. <wink>
The astute music-file/recording artist/duplication provider may actually find the title of this post amusing because it combines some musical terminology that may not be familiar to the general public. See, when you cover a published song on a distributed recording, you have to pay royalties to the songwriter(s) and publisher(s) of the source material. It’s called a mechanical royalty and is based on the number of units you produce. Interestingly enough, you can actually perform any covers you want live (as long as they are not recorded or broadcast) without any sort of royalty payment ot the intellectual property owner. So… we can blame that little lapse for the mind numbing number of times I’ve had to hear Piano Man while trying to enjoy a nice meal in a mid range restaurant with my bets girl.
Anyway, the thought that inspired this post was my love of album or CD covers that use mechanical or industrial objects. Sometimes it is just an object. Sometimes it it is a collage or constructed image using metals and spools and pulleys and things. I just love that kind of stuff. Shiny, rusty, greasy metal. So cool.
Examples? They may date me. Or maybe not. My tastes are pretty fixed.
Check out these awesome covers from Jawbox, The Orb, and Cop Shoot Cop.
Back when I did radio, we had all this mobile dj equipment for parties and such. We had the coffin covered in carpet, housing two turntables (and a microphone!) and a portable CD player by the mid 90s. Nowadays they’ve got CD scratchers and mixing apps for the iPhone. I mean, on the one hand, it’s cool to be able mix between tracks with an iPod and rock the house mp3 style. But really, it’s gotten way too hard to witness a classic scratch artist working the vinyl. Sure, there are purists out there still keeping it real, but the wedding scene, man, it’s technology all the way. What happened to mullets and tuxedo t-shirts? I’m so old.
I was talking guitar with the Mom of one of my oldest son’s friends last night at the school’s holiday concert. I was explaining that while the size of my guitar collection is impressive, I don’t have any standout show pieces of significant value. I have a few cheap instruments to beat on and a good number of very serviceable performer’s instruments. I never picked up a crazy high priced instrument because my guitars were taken out to clubs and bars and where they get knocked over, spilled on and stolen.
But I do love my Dearmonds. I’ve surely written about them before. They were Korean and later Indonesian-made guitars based on classic Guild models. Fender set up the line after acquiring Guild in the 90s. They already owned the Dearmond brand of classic American electronics, so they combined the two and created a line of imports that outsold their higher priced American counterparts.
One of my favorites is an M72, which is based on the Guild Bluebird. The Bluesbird had that classic Les Paul look. Like a carved top Gibson Les Paul Studio or Standard rather than the slab body junior style. It’s such a sweet player, but man, is it heavy!
I was recently watching a documentary on Indie Video Game development. they covered 3 different games and their creators. It was entertaining and pretty well made, I thought. But it got me thinking about the upcoming holidays and my kids. Yes, we have a console and they have handheld devices. But as we approach the time for salivation over gifts, none have brought up video games.
Instead they are asking for clay and legos and in one case, Dr. Who paraphernalia. I can totally live with that.
Last year, the then-9 year old’s big gift was a trumpet. Replacing the school rental. Super awesome, right? How cool is it that while still in single digits, my kid went for an instrument over… anything else?
And next year it will be the same with my middle guy. He’ll be in the music program and we’ll be shopping for… who knows what? Pearl flutes? Student violins? Trombones?
Ah, the holidays. Marvelous and musical!
So I got caught up in my Beyonce hate, and really, I don’t like her at all, but I forgot the important thing about lyric sites… the comments. If you can stomach actually reading something Beyonce has sung, more power to you. I enjoy seeing how they write out all the oooohing and ahhing and dibble-dee-doo and other vocal gymastic nonsense that Billboard just loves to numerically catalogue these days. One man’s jibber jabber is another man’s onomatopoeia.
Seriously, though. Wave your arms to clear the air of the scent of versace perfumes, armagnac, and that “new Adidas smell” and read what the kids have to say about the poetry of Beyonce. I mean, they fight. Not just verbal sparring, but they threaten and attack one another. All it takes is one “Beyonce sucks” post to get the masses in an uproar and start the violence a-flying.
One emo kid on an aging laptop in a Idaho basement can rile thousands of acolytes into a Koresh style act of commenting retribution. The future is here and it is bleak. It is also trite and exceptionally cliche.
And woo woo woo, why can’t you-ooo-oo-oo-oooooo…just understa-haa-hand me-ee-eeya.
Want a glimpse into contemporary American cultural viability? I invite you to visit any lyrics website on the Web that allows for comments. Search on something juicy like “meaningful Beyonce lyrics.” Now, stop chuckling. Of COURSE Beyonce’s lyrics are meanignful. Deeply spiritual and meaningful. Life changing in fact.
Hah! Didn’t think I could write that with a straight face, did you?
Sure, any semi-intelligent, upright-walking mammal SHOULD be able to sniff out the general thematic leanings of Beyonce’s art. And if you like it you can put scott kay bands all over it. For reals.
If you are attractive and wealthy and willing to expose your lust/affection/erectile dysfunction/Daddy-Daughter issues to me by disposing of a significant portion of your wealth in the service/adoration of me, I will sleep with you as part of a good Christian girl’s courting ritual.
How you know she’s a hypocrite? Look who she married. He may be absurdly wealthy (and who knows about the dysfunction thing – but there are pills for that) but attractive?