Tell me more you ask?

Right, so I mentioned the Skateboard Heroes recently and I’m already getting questions. Actually, I don’t think I gave the actual title, but I’ve been talking about it so much offline that a lot of folks knew exactly what it is. And yes, as I said, it is a comic book based on photography? What does that mean? Essentially, I take photographs of various actors and then process through Photoshop and Lay it all out in Illustrator so it looks like a “real” comic book.

Basically, when I needed a construction worker in the story I found an almost talented actor (actually it was me) to wear a hard hat and toolbelt. If I need a nurse and you have a nurses uniform, you could be my next star.

So, far, the response to my first draft half issue story has been extremely positive. Comic retailers, readers and semi-pro artists have all embraced it pretty enthusiastically. With a little tweaking, the first few pages will be posted on a new Website (Pope Street affiliated) for your enjoyment.

The Heroes are Coming

Soon. Very soon. Yup, soon I will be posting links to my newest project: Skateboard Heroes. It is a comic book (with some musical tie-ins) and it is going to rock. You know I’m not into exaggeration and hyperbole or whatever, so you can take this pretty seriously when I say it is going to be the absolute best and coolest thing you’ve ever read and/or heard. Ever.

Seriously.

Actually, when you stop chuckling, take this to heart – it actually should be pretty entertaining. It’s comic art based on photography, and the story is entirely inspired by my kids.

What can you look forward to in the first issue? How about hardhats, guns, car chases, thugs with stockings on their heads and lots of skateboarding. No, no sexy camouflage lingerie. Not yet anyway…

Hey Drivers!

Hey you! You in the car. You, talking on the cell phone and not paying attention as you drift into my lane. And you, in the pickup truck in the Home Depot parking lot. You know you have to look in the rear view and perhaps even over your shoulder before backing up, right? Seriously people. I know I’m rapidly aging but I’m totally NOT ready for funeral planning just yet, ‘kay?

Alright…I know the economy sucks and there are natural disasters ravaging our planet on a weekly basis, but come on, peeps. Some of us still have amusing children and hot wives to go home to. Just because your life is in the shitter doesn’t mean you have to take me out when you fly into that final dirt nap. Really. The correlation between bad news and horrid driving is way too apparent. Can we do something about that?

Anywhere I lay my head…

You know what costs a pretty penny these days? Mattresses. Seriously. We just did a bed rotation among the kids and found out. See, the baby isn’t ready for a bed yet, but she will be someday, and the middle kids had a kind of crappy bed. It’s fine for him since he’s light, and it will be fine for the baby because she will surely be even lighter, but my chunky butt really puts a dent in the thing.

So I figured when all the President Day sales were happening we should buy a new bed. We got a full for the oldest boy with the biggest room. We moved his really nice twin to the middle kid, and we stuck the extra mattress and box spring in the attic for when the baby is ready.

The logic behind the full was that we could have a bigger bed for friends who want to stay over. It may not be a hotel king, but for an overnight, any two reasonably sized adults could get a decent nights sleep.

Yup, we’ve substantially increased our ability to host sleepovers without reliance on the air beds. Yeah. We rock.

Wondering why?

So, you want to know why comic writing can be so much superior than other mainstream storytelling – like TV, film, and mass market fiction? Simple – and summed up in 3 words. Print on demand.

See, every issue that is published is distributed primarily through direct sales. That means, with the exception of a few titles from the biggest publishers that you will find in a grocery store or convenience mart, comics are only sold through recognized retailers. Comic shops, toy stores and hobby retailers have the market pretty much sealed up. And everything they sell is based on preorders a couple months before printing. So, with few exceptions, the publishers are printing based on orders. Yes, they do print some excess, but they are not printing, like, a million copies of a new titles because they think it will be big, and then saturating the back issue market with the 500,000 copies that did immediately sell.

This means they are not really speculating, and are very keyed in to the size and scope of particular audiences. It also means that they are not taking the kind of chances that, say, a record label takes with a new artist. The labels spend millions promoting the new artist, buying airtime in stores and Grammy nods and television and movie placements. Every artist has to be a franchise. That’s why every pseudo-diva has to have a clothing line, a fragrance line, a false-diamond jewelry line and a b-movie career to augment all the times they tell you to buy term life insurance and acne medication and exercise gear.

See, the comic publisher are not putting a thousand eggs in one basket. They have may titles and special one-shots and mini series going out every week. They try things – new artists, new writers, different cover treatments. They are constantly reinventing themselves. Quite the opposite of, say, the next Hollywood blockbuster which I can guarantee will feature no fewer than 4 recognized celebrities, 2 up and comers and 2 unknowns with the potential to be up and comers, a racy but not raunchy sex scene, a car chase that involves something other than a car (plane that hasn’t taken off, boat on a trailer, motorcycle, etc. because car chases with just cars have been done too much), and a substantial commercial product tie-in with something you can eat, drink or wear on your feet.

Comics barely even have ads in them anymore. You should totally check it out.

Speaking of Comics…

Have I told you lately how awesome comics are? Seriously. It is probably the last major media outlet that is not totally owned by a handful of suits that require an absolute formula for all properties. Sure, Hollywood can occasionally make a movie worth watching, but it’s mostly the same old crap over and over again. Like mainstream radio music. It’s the same crap written by the same crappy songwriters with the same lyrical cliches being spouted by the flavor of the month singer. Yes, once in a while you hear a radio song that doesn’t make your ears bleed, but it is rare.

But in comics, there is still enough independence to allow for stories of all types. Horror, super-heroes, neo noir, coming of age college girls, retellings of fairy tales featuring scantily clad young ladies…Great stuff. There are stories for music fans, gambling fans,  monte carlo fans, anime fans, detective fiction fans…hell, even ceiling fans. Trust me. Some of the best creative writing you can find right now is in comic books. You should check it out.

e-comics

Long-time friends…I mean really really long-time friends, will remember my brief foray into an attempt at comic book writing many years ago. Many many. Recently, I’ve been making notes and considering a return to the attempt. I figure what the hell, I’m a failed rock star, why not be a failed comic writer too? I’ve been reading them a ton lately, and I’ve really found my love for the medium…again. Um, re-found my love? I don’t know exactly how to say, but you get the point.

Anyway, one of the great new innovations in the world of comic books is digital comics. Yup, you can get online subscriptions and all that. Not too shabby if you are a pure reader and not so much into collecting the books and accumulating all that dead plant matter. Me…I like the dead plants. Sorry. I just like to hold ’em.

Thing is, there are apps for cellphones from the various publishers of note (and these days there are a lot of them) that allow you to read the comics on your iPhone or Droid or whatever. It’s very cool…conceptually, but WAY too small of a canvas. You need Nikon binoculars to read the text. It’s just not there yet. But maybe…soon…digi-comics will be a happening option.

A New Frock

Yeah, the site needs a new outfit, don’t you think? I’m bored with the photo montage nonsense. But since I’m a  WordPress user, there are some limitations to the templates and such. At least for me, not being a php-maestro. I’m old school. I’m not against innovation. Read the wix reviews, if a Flash site is your thing, have at it. Lately, though, I’m seeing so much expansive design. Huge images and flashy animations. It can pretty cool, no doubt, but are all of these sites serving their purpose.

I remember back in the day when designers has to actually consider file size. We had to think about bandwidth and server load. These days optimization is an almost forgotten art. DSL and cable modems have made sensible design passe, a thing of the past.

I, for one, mourn the loss.

Weather or not…

I’ve always said I love the seasons. And it is true. Even when we have 73 feet of snow in a winter. I still love the seasons. I don’t even really mind the clean up. It’s a drag sometimes. Sometimes my eyebrows get all iced up and the blow back from the snowblower is stinging and blinding. My back aches from the shoveling. Then the snowblower breaks down and I have to shovel about a half million cubic yards of ice and snow so we can walk the kids down the driveway to the bus stop (because there’s NO way there spending one more day at home, the little maniacs!) And the power goes out and we start pricing honda generators, saying “next year, maybe if we get a decent tax refund or something.”

Still, in spite of all the challenges, I still love the seasons. I really really do. Except for one thing. All the people who are bitching and moaning about how cold it is are going to be bitching and moaning about the heat in a couple of months. “It’s ridiculous!” they will exclaim. “This humidity is total bullshit!” they will shout. And I’ll be wishing I could drown out the whining with my snowblower…

Then again…

Yeah, you’re right. I probably shouldn’t be too worried about the skin of midwestern crooners with puffy lips and all of their musical talent below the neck. In other words, female singers made for video, not radio.

Considering the amount of joking I’m doing about this whole rapture thing, chances are I’d be left behind on my couch even if I did believe in such manufactured nonsense. (And I say that because it’s actually not in the bible – not the way these wackos talk about it. Read it sometime, it’s actually a pretty neat book.)

Still, if there is even a whiff of truth to it all, I’m going to be the guy looking for a stash of eczema cream because I can tell you now brothers and sisters, it is gonna be a scorcher.

Testify!