Villain!

If you use AOL Instant Messenger, like I often do, you are probably familiar with the AIM Dashboard. It’s a little “portal” page that opens up in your browser of choice whenever you log in. I like it because there are always a few teaser newsbits, often from TMZ, that keep me informed about the happenings in the lives of all my favorite celebs. For example, I just found out that Lindsay Lohan was recently spotted chugging vodka. Surprise surprise. I guess she hasn’t accepted Jesus as her personal savior yet, but it’s only a matter of time, right? Oh yeah, and they tell me that Miley Cyrus keeps slutting it up. This sort of news brings me some solace, hoping that she will soon pose for Playboy and the Hannah Montana empire will begin its slow, inevitable crumble. Today’s featured line of Target handbags will be tomorrow’s Dollar Store crop of poorly made pencil cases and melamine HM kiddie mugs.

I’m sure Disney will bring us an even more insipid tween nightmare in her wake, but maybe, just maybe, they’ll come up with something really cool – like a middle-American high school honor student wrestling with his sexuality. Hilarious politically correct, sexuality-sensitive hijinks and Three’s Company-esque misunderstandings will no doubt ensue. I can’t wait.

Anyway, rambling aside, one of the Dashboard items this morning was a “Where are they now” bit about the cast of the classic movie The Goonies, inspired by rumors of an upcoming sequel. Sean Astin, or Mikey (and alleged source of the sequel rumor), has made a name for himself as both the unlikely football hero, Rudy, and endearingly loyal Hobbit, Sam. Jeff Cohen, the kid who played Chunk, is now a slightly trimmer entertainment lawyer. Ke Huy Quan who played Data also appeared in the second Indiana Jones movie, and is now doing stuff like being a martial arts coordinator on the X-Men movie. And he was in Encino Man, so…he’s got that going for him too.

Martha Plimpton does some TV and is a pretty successful Broadway actress. Joe Pantoliano almost messed everything up for the human race in The Matrix and ended up in a bowling bag – at least partially – on The Sopranos. Josh Brolin, besides having a badass Papa and terrifying stepmom, has done a ton of stuff. And Corey Feldman is…well…I have nothing else to say about that.

Here’s the funny part – and the point of this whole entry. Thank you for reading this far. Both of you.

If you remember the bad guys in The Goonies, there was the older brother, Jake Fratelli, played by actor Robert Davi. The little AIM Dashboard “where are they now” bit noted that Davi has had a long and role-filled career, distinguished by the fact that he usually plays a villain of some stripe. He’s in several movies, and he’s done a lot of TV, and he’s almost always a vicious bad guy. And then for no real reason, the micro essay mentions that Davi is a very vocal supporter of both George W. Bush and the war in Iraq.

They say that for some people acting is a real challenge, particularly acting like a villainous ass-munch. I guess for others it just comes naturally.